Updates

Ok,ramai dah maklum my pregnancy has ended and i had safely delivered my second princes - Nur'Aliya Farhana on 30 oct 2008 @ 7.42pm. She was 3 and 1/2week earlier than her duedate.my babies are always early.
Now im spendg è pantang time @kg. What a relief since now is cuti sekolah n è weather is nice.memula balik quite panas..tatahan mak..taula dlm pntg kena panas2 blaka-stokin,barut 24h.eh ok la

mila oh milaa

ok here's some pictures

ni anak dara ku tgh eksyen trying out my mekap


the pierced ears




and..
budak perasan jd mila..

being a mila fan, she always says nk ikat rambut mcm mila, cantik mcm mila..
so kalau nk pujuk suruh dia sikat rambut terpaksa la ku guna nama mila itu.
but tokma selalu ckp kat dia, mil got taik lalat, where's yours?
and tokma decide to give her some taik lalat semlm...

haa??

saya ingin memberi beberapa maklumat baru buat tatapan kawan2 semua

pertama:
motor kesayangan suami saya telah terbalik buat pertama kali beberapa hari lepas kerana suami saya tergeleceh ketika memaking motonya itu. sakit pinggang katanya mengangkat motor itu kembali. nasib baik tidak calar atau patah riuk.
ulasan ibu mertua saya kepada anaknya : tu la beli motor tak padan dgn badan! hehe
saya tumpang gelak shj.
wlaubagaimanapun, mlm itu motor itu telah tercalar kerana dia stop betul2 di depan pagar rumah lalu terkena pagar apabila saya membukanya. saya tidak pandai mengkontrol pagar oto itu, oleh itu saya main tekan shj butang tersebut tanpa peduli pagar belah mana yg akan terbuka.

kedua:
sebaik sjh campai di rumah semlm anak saya menangis berdrama sambil menunjukkan telinganya yg telah dipakaikan subang. menurut laporan balas ibu mertua saya, anak saya yg beria2 hendak memakai subang di telinga lantas dibawanya masuk ke kedai pohkong di tesco extra. sebaik shj kena tembak, anak saya seakan terkejut lalu menangis bertalu2, tetapi senyap apabila dipujuk dgn menunjukkan berjenis2 subang yang ada dikedai itu. sungguh materialistik anak itu.
selepas beberapa ketika, dia menari terjoget2 sambil mengetap2 bibir dan kepala sebagai tanda excited yang teramat sgt
sebelum ini anak saya telah menunjukkan minat yg terlampau terhadap brg perhiasan wanita termasuklah baju gon, alat mekap, kasut dan beg tangan. dia juga pernah berbisik ke telinga gelpren abang ipar saya supaya membelikannya subang gantung2 spt yg dipakai oleh gepren abg ipar saya itu.
buat seketika saya agak terkucil kerana saya berangan2 untuk membawa sendiri anak saya untuk ditebuk telinga nya. kerana ini adlah pengalaman pertamannya sebagai persiapan untuk menjadi seorang wanita. bak kata seorang kawan saya dalam bahasa inggeris ' this is her first lesson that beauty is pain!'
tapi perkara ini tidaklah saya simpan di dalam hati, atau di bawa dalam perahu kerana saya tahu ibu mertua saya sangat sayangkan cucunya dan saya tidaklah mahu menjadi batu penghalang antara mereka.

saja nk simpan gambar ni..

SYAWAL 2008/1429H

Salam syawal to all..
today im back to the office after the raya break.
raya was busy, and tiring. nevertheless it was fun, eventho i had limited time to spend wif my family side - sebab tahun ni turn hubby.
first day raya was lonely spent on s.alam. i didnt go for solat raya sebab hubby tak kasi bawa aisyah. actual plan nk balik utara right after solat but then the guuys belasah tido sampai ke ptg. ye la dah the night before dah beraya tak hengat, pukul 4 pg baru ingat nk balik rumah. so utk menyelamatkan keadaan my inlaws decide to go back early next morning.we make a pit stop at my bil's house at penang, then proceed to aloq setaq.
eventho most of his family reside kat aloq setaq juga, we spent most of the time visiting his family je, takkan nk ajak segala rakyat jelata tu pi buat rombongan ke rumah sedara aku pulakk
cuma bila mlm we went back to my parents to sleep.
onnly on the 4th raya baru betul2 duduk rumah dgn my parents. makngah pulak tak sihat so she didnt come to our place as usual.
esoknya (ahad) dah nk kena balik kl. mmg tak sempat nk jln beraya la
aisyah seronok la jumpa all her makciks <- daddy's cousin sumer kecik2 lagi so ramai la maksu, makcik, pakcik.. sampai dia pun konpius gambar raya aku cuma 3 keping je hehe, tah la.. cam takdak nafsu nk tangkap gambar

ramadhan bakal berlalu

realized i havent write anything bout ramadhan this year, apart from baju raya and all
hmm this year is quite frustrating
ramadhan, as most would put up as the lubuk pahala of all months..
i think i dun really make use of it..*sigh*
maybe due to pregnancy (see stil nk cari ekskius kann hehe) im too tired when finally got home. nk buat yg wajib pun alahaiii.. nk baca quran rasa mengah sgt
apa lg nk buat terawih.. harap pahala niat je la kot hihi ( tu pun if Allah is pemurah enough to grant it to me..)
hr2 balik keka just pikir nk mkn apa utk berbuka.. eh tak pikir pun pasai berbuka kat rumah mak, so makan je apa yg ada. so cuma kena pikir on wiken je
so much of my azam last ramadhan - becoming a better person each year..

another thing, i havent set foot to any pasar ramadhan lagi tahun ni..
too tired to tawaf. lg pun mcm takde masa je. sampai rumah dah 6+ malas nk kuar
wiken pun hujan la, tertido la..byk la halangan2

its another 4 days to go
i hope i can complete the 30days of puasa this year. yahooooo!!
and i do hope dipanjangkan umur untk diberi peluang meraikan ramadhan lagi tahun depan.. semogoa dpt peluang menggandakan amalan (not to mention the pahala) utk cover bekal amalan yg berlobang2

but
after raya akan berdebar2 pulak menanti kedatangan org baru ini..

aku kebosanan dan jiwa kacauu

finally ibumertuaku yg baik ati berjaya juga membeli kebaya untuk cucu dia. aku syak dah lama dia berangan nk pakaikan aisyah kebaya. aku lak kepingin nk cari kebaya sulam ala indon tu tp masa jumpa takdak saiz. last week jumpa kat ampang park reganya mak aiiii lebih dr bajet baju raya ibu mu ini nak oii..
so baju raya anak udah setel. tinggai baju omak sama bapaknya saja

nk interprem tudung raya aku hehe


remember ibu mertuaku yg baik ati (againn) belikan bakul utk isi brg baby hr tu?
aku baru bisik2 kat dia tanya agak2 berapa meter kain nk pakai nk wat padding dlm tu, dia ckp takpe la mak antar kat florist yg mak biasa pi tu.
and hasilnya...



hb said ala makkk geli la nk bawa gi spital gini.. wakakaka
siap bunga2 bagai, mcm bekas hantaran je

ini budak aa
nangis sambil korek idung
multitasking betoi haha

so i've been tagged, eh?

5 TABIAT BURUK TIME SEKOLAH
err apa eh.. dah lama laa tinggaikan sekolah
kurasa rasa la:
1. tido waktu prep (hey, who doesnt?)
2. gaduh dgn makcik dan pakcik kentin (esp yg nama toing toing tuu!)
hehe tah apa motif tah.
3. mmm..tghr jumaat lepak depan padang (selepas kekenyangan melantak kat dewan makan) semata2 nk usya boys gi solat jumaat
4. suka usik cikgu tuisyen matematik.. hehe sampai quit cikgu tu..kesiann
5.the most ku rasa - ratu tido dlm kelass, dr form 1 sampai laa form 5 hehe

3 FAVOURITE SUBJEK ANDA... KENAPA??
1. prinsip akaun - sebab cara cikgu tu ajar the subjek jadi senang sgt and semua org score A!
2. fizik - cikgu tu kelakar habis, tak sangkaa.. sebab muka dia serius stern and garang gilerr hehe
3. chemistry - sebab masa tu la berangan jadi saintis konon, masuk lab suka2 campur2 menda dlm tabung uji, nasib baik tak meletup

aku tambah la satu lagi - i like history too, especially sejarah zaman dulu2

3 SUBJEK ANDA TAK SUKA... KENAPA??
apa eh.. kemahiran idop? ok ja
1. pendidikan jasmani?? hehe ku bukan atlit savvy
emmm apa lagi yaa
haa mostly subjek kat uni kot
used to hate economics but later found myself enjoying it
2. public sector accounting - busangggg giler. even now bila dah keja dgn gomen pun ku rasa pendekatan subjek yg sungguh tidak membawa menafaat.
3. management accounting - sungguh memeningkan kepalaaaa

MENARIK PADA KAMU...?
apa yg menarik nya? sila revise soklan anda yee
menarik pada diriku kah?
atau benda yg buat ku tertarik?

KAMU PALING SUKA...?
berangann...

ANDA TIDAK BOLEH HIDUP TANPA...
er.. cinta ati ku - hubby and anak

SETIAP MALAM SEBELUM TIDUR SIAPA YANG ANDA HUBUNGI...
nobody
err God maybe (in my prayers)

MANGSA TAG KAMU
sesiapa yg baca ni..
haa sila berlaku jujur yaa!!

Berakhirnya satu penantian..

dia tiba jua.. at last!
after few days of restlesness, not to mention lack of focus and moodiness
the much awaited big boy is here
hubby cant stop grinning from ear to ear when he finally got to bring it back last nite.



and that's all he talked about the whole nite
we dun manage to get the same reg no as the car, but close enoughh at 6224. ok la tu

and to all.. watch out for the return of makcik rempit di jalan2raya berdekatan anda!! Muahahahahaa!!!

raya fever

bought this for aisyah at a shop at shah alam for only RM18
at first want to get something blue, as mak said the theme this year is blue
but unfortunately no size available for her. so i just settle for this, dengan harapan ku ada can nk soping lagi hehehe
but the kain is quite jarang, i might need to add in the inside layer to cover her transparent bottom a bit. well depends on my mood la agaknya
agak2 malas (err.. ku bukan reti jahit sgt lgpon hihi, plus its tricky since the waist part has no cangkuk ke apa, sumer getah) or i cudnt manage to get anyone to do it, ku pakaikan aje haha alah budak2 pakai jarang biar je la.. baru masuk angin sket, tak panas anak aku haha alasan dari hati kecil seorang ibu yg kemalasan..

i stil cudnt find anything for myself
now since aisyah got that, i might need something purplish to match her, beside the official blue thing
now, the prob is i cudnt find THAT THING yet..
aiyoooo soo susah mau cari something in that colors AND can fit in my big tummy.
tudung oredi got hihi
thinking of getting some jubah, or long blouse, or baju kurung pahang (if it still fits)

my first ever pursepal
btw i got it as door gift for company dinner, till now still havent got a chance to use it
actually i got 2
so i gave one to a friend who kind enough to lend her belly belt


mom in law bought this lovely box to carry baby stuffs
but since its not padded, i had to sew in some kain alas inside
so one of objective this wiken : go buy the material

what a drooling dreamms..

hubby have been lobbying me to get new bike, but this time he want a superbike
woohoooo!
i nver have thought he could ride one (sorry dear!) dulu2 tgk you bawak rxz pun cam nk terbalik je ekeke
but since he have been putting on some weight lately, and seeing him actioning on the bikes hmm.. maybe..ok la kot hihi
he's been complaining bout my old dad's bike he is using now
of course la old man sure byk songeh.. kejap2 ada je menda nk kena tukar/repair
and mkn myk quite byk compared to new model
another point he never forget to remind me - that motor cannot bawa laju dah.. thats why he cannot come home earlier.. ye laaa...
to think that the same motor used to send me to school, pick me whenever i came back from college on those days.. its quite a memory, but no doubt it's about time to give him some rest.. siannn kau motor.

and the fact that my bro has got himself an Ap*rilia makes hubby itching more ekeke!
currently he has his eyes on this baby (baby apa besar gabak gini hihi)

but i'm kind of more like this type of bike

i think it looks so sporty, and the fact that it doesnt looks so bagak, it shud be more suited for a ride in town. btw that the reason why we bought the bike rite?
but the price wallaaaaa.... i can get a lowcost apt for the price!!!
i wud rather have a house, than splurging on something that cannot even shed me from the rain, apalagi nk tido atas moto??

hubby call me obsessive
wat ever laaa.. as long as hati ku puass
mmg ku suka menda2 yang menyenangkan idup ku ni
last week at last berjaya pujuk hubby beli microfiber mop to replace the old one yg dah patah. memula tu beli yg mur2 ja, sebab fes time nak try test dulu cemana rasanya
its good and easy to use, i dun like the old hair mop, leces laaa
with this microfibre i can just take off the lining (do we called that? ye ke?) and trash into washing mesin, and its refillable.
another plus point is it can double up as duster cum penyapu. senang for quick cleaning
but mop wont be complete without the detergent rite? hehe
i just love kiwi kleen multipurpose cleaner
just spray2 here n there and lap.. wallaaa
dapor ku bebas dari myk segala
apa2 je tumpah kat lantai pun senang nak hilang
and i can use it on practically any surface - plastic, marble tiles, wood, bontot kuali and even cloth haha (this one not guarantee la but since it says kill germ so i give it a go though hihi)
anyway, i never use lysol. some said its good too.
as for toilet, currently i am using maxkleen.
its done a great job, just picit under the seat, leave it for a while and flush away to sparkling clean toilet bowl. no need to brush teruk2 - unless u had a very tough stain there of course
it leaves a bluish tint that makes my bowl look super clean hehe
ooh i just loovee anything that make my life easier.

anyway, on the greener note
i was told that too much detergent is not good for health, not to mention the environment
esp for pregnant ladies
so at the meantime i try to minimise contact as much as possible
meaning i dun use on periuk or any surface that contactable with food and i make sure i don inhale while working with them hehe - just imajine myself holding my breath while doing the cleaning!
there are advises to use baking soda and vinegar, which claims can do wonder as much as these manufactured chemicals but i never tried them. but the smell of vinegar in my toilet? oh noooo!!

new boys in town

just got this fr emel
i dunno la bila exactly akan launch






the rear looks a bit like c*aldina, but with weird looking window. err do you call that cermin belakang window eh? hehe sorry la wa mukan reti sgt pasai kereta ni
looks sporty, but at the same time kinda scary ekeke
who know that kind of design might be the new motor fad in the future
just look at its other older sister and brother - when it first introduced in the road many were complaining bout the weird design, whic at closer look i do think it resemble top makers' design
but somehow it still looking cheap hehe

today aku lah rajaaa!!!!
yesss
the boss, my second boss and my koliq were all on leave today, leaving me alone in the office.
and esok ku cuti for 2 days. saja dok rumah jaga aisyah since mak have to go to court, its the hearing (eh?) for fifi's marital case. hope everything turns up fine for them. poor little khalis..

i went browsing my previous entries, and would like to comment/updates what have been going on in the past years
1. yes, this year we do celebrate anniversary with 3 1/2 of us hihi (grin..grinn)alhamdulillah, thank God for the rezeki He bestowed upon us.

2. my current job is practically okayyy.. i no more handle the investment division, meaning less headache and less hectic. but here it different kind of headache hehe.. biasa la work anywhere sure got headache wannnn. and im grateful i had been promoted plus the yearly bonus and salary increment is good. nevertheless, this year must work harder to achieve ke KPIs and segala bancai belen scorecard #%^$&^^& if i want to retain them.. ahhhh here come my headache..

3. looking back at the pictures.. now aisyah got more hair hehe, now can ikat a bit. but most of the time i will just put the sepit or little hair clip because i like to see her curly hair dangle dangle ling ling hihi not to mention its easier that way (mak must have thought that aku malas nk siap anak hehe) but it will only stay for few minuntes until she pulled it away or it easily become loose..

ok till then..

the office is half empty
my staff mostly involved in KL RatRace, if not running, they are the pompom girls hehe
my bos also already left to support the team
me busan aaa nk join..
lapar? not really, stil quite full after lunch with nasi beriani ayam courtesy from ceramah agama tadi. tp mulut ni biasa la rasa nk mengunyah je hehe
ask the cadbury choc from my staff for snacks

but belek punya belek ku tgk tadek tanda halal pon??
dah le made in austolia..
tak jadi ler kot
sayonara la cadbury oiii
tp kan siries sedap la itu cekelatt..

mother.. my angel

i've been looking for this article/story for quite sometimes because i like it sooo much. i've read it somewhere sometime ago but lost it until a fren forward it to me today. love you sheen!

Malaikatmu.....


Suatu hari seorang bayi siap untuk dilahirkan ke dunia...

Dia bertanya kepada Tuhan : " Para malaikat disini mengatakan bahawa besok Engkau akan mengirimkan saya kedunia, tetapi bagaimana cara saya hidup disana; saya begitu kecil dan lemah ?"

Dan Tuhan menjawab: "Aku telah memilih satu malaikat untukmu. Ia akan menjaga dan mengasihimu ."

Bayi bertanya lagi: "Tetapi disini; didalam syurga ini, apa yang saya lakukan hanyalah bernyanyi, bermain dan tertawa...Inikan sudah cukup bagi saya untuk berbahagia."

"Malaikatmu akan bernyanyi dan tersenyum untukmu setiap hari. Dan kamu
akan merasakan kehangatan cintanya dan menjadi lebih berbahagia"

"Dan bagaimana bisa saya mengerti disaat orang-orang berbicara kepada saya
jika saya tidak mengerti bahasa mereka ?" "Malaikatmu akan berbicara kepadamu dengan bahasa yang paling indah yang pernah kamu dengar; dan dengan penuh kesabaran dan perhatian. Dia akan mengajar kepadamu cara berbicara."

"Dan apa yang akan saya lakukan saat saya ingin berbicara kepadaMu ?"
"Malaikatmu akan mengajarkan bagaimana cara kamu berdoa"

"Saya mendengar bahawa di Bumi banyak orang jahat. Siapa yang akan melindungi saya ?" "Malaikatmu akan melindungimu; walaupun hal tersebut mungkin akan mengancam jiwanya"

"Tapi, saya pasti akan merasa sedih kerana tidak melihatMu lagi"
"Malaikatmu akan menceritakan kepadamu tentang Aku, dan akan mengajarkan
bagaimana agar kamu bisa kembali kepadaKu; walaupun sesungguhnya Aku akan sentiasa disisimu"

Disaat itu, Syurga begitu tenang dan heningnya sehingga suara dari Bumi dapat terdengar, dan sang bayi bertanya perlahan : "Tuhan, jika saya harus pergi sekarang, bisakah Kamu memberitahuku nama malaikat tersebut ?"

"Kamu akan memanggil malaikatmu itu: " IBU "

Ingatlah sentiasa kasih sayang dan pengorbanan ibu. Berbakti, berdoa dan cintailah dia sepanjang masa..... Dialah sesatunya harta yang tiada galang gantinya dunia akhirat...

Dan untuk para ibu, ingatlah kisah ini dikala kamu hilang sabar dengan karenah anak-anak yang sedang membesar....sesungguhnya Syurga itu dibawah telapak kakimu...

Sucikanlah 4 hal dengan 4 perkara :
1) Wajahmu dengan linangan air mata keinsafan,
2) Lidahmu basah dengan berzikir kepada Penciptamu,
3) Hatimu takut dan gementar kepada kehebatan Rabbmu, dan dosa-dosa yang silam
4) Di sulami dengan taubat kepada Dzat yang Memiliki mu."

pregnancy updates

week : 24
ala lupa pulak nk ukurlilit pinggang ku hihi

berat : 56.5kg, naik 2kg fr last month
total weight gain - lebih kurang 7kg la kot
bump is getting bumpier by day
and i noticed my rear is expanding tooo huhuhuu!

body conditions/problem : so far ok, no body marks watsoever, no pimples
but noticed right ear always 'blocked'..tensennnn!!
bila berckp im not sure am i loud enough
lain2 biasa la lenguh, sakit2 badan esp my back
cravings : yeapppp mummy stil craves ice-cream and coffee a lot!!! and not to forget kopitiam roti bakar

baby : so far everything looks fine, except im stil not able to tell isit hotdog
or buger :-p whicever we dun mind, mummy will love u not less!
last checkup 11/08/2008 err not sure what's your measurement,
mummy so busy checking and usyaring the spot between your leg hehe.
so far baby moves a lot! sometime it tickle me hehe
but semlm my gymae said baby position kat bawah (no wonder perutku berat ke bawah) and it looks like baby is a bit songsang.
hope u will turn when the time comes, will ya baby? pleasee....

what else hmmm??

there pics of my tummy @22w


thats the best shot hehe, amik sendiri
hubby not really keen bab2 cegini

can u see my bump?

ok pusing skett.. haa nmpk tak?


i actually did shot my naked tummy haha
looks quite enormous, but maluuu la mau tyg sini ekeke

Cinta ku beralih arah??

i noticed something had changed recently..
was it me.. or its just the matter of time
maybe its the time to change, to breath the 'different' air
a change of prespective
or maybe i am not that 'reserved' anymore, or could be im losing my self-conciousness

what ever it is
im not saying goodbye
as im keeping my options open

i want to still be able to choose between you two:
Door 2 or Door 3
hehe
normally i would have my 'preferred' toilet cubicle anywhere i frequent
here at the office i used to step into the door 3, i dunno why. just feeling more comfortable in there. and part of it due to hygenic reason. i tot by limiting my usage of variable toilet seats will reduce the chances of me getting infections ... watever
but suddenly found myself frequented the second cubicle in the row instead of the usual third
and i realize the place is lot brighter
and i kinda like it
so for time being i'l try to stick to it hehe

at lastt!!!

yuhuuu
today got great news, somehow we were able to get our internet connection back!!
alhamdulillah
eventho i dunno for how long i'l be able to enjoy this
i'l savour every moment hihi
great to be back!!
hello everyone!!
HAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHA

sunday 6 july 2008
hubby having futsal tournament iwth his colleague, so i took the opportunity to have a girls day out with Aisyah. we went to klcc to catch a movie, mostly because she's been saying nk tgk wayangg.. for days.
of course i can only took my chance with kungfu panda, eventho i dun really fancy that kungfu kartun..tah la..but since many claim its good so..here we are.
get to klcc quite early, im hoping to get the ticket in ease since it weekend beb..sure ramai manusia nk tgk wayang. but got distracted all the wayy huhu
aisyah will drag me to EVERY toy car she saw!!!


at first it's thomas merry go round, i was lucky since the maintenance boy treat us with free ride hihi
then she wanted to try ALLL other rides as well. to keep her quiet i just put her down for a while, actuall reason was im out of coins.
i was soo desperate to shee shee by then but aisyah wanted to go inside toyrus pulakk
jenuh ku pujuk her to come with me to the toilet
by the time we reached tgv, the line was already snaking around.. hmmm
no choice but to get into the line.. with aisyah. luckily she wasnt the wandering type, but standing quietly next to me all the way to the ticket counter. once a while she will ask me to dokong her..yeah she must be tired berdiri lama2
finally got the ticket 15mint befor the show start, fhewww what a good timing
by this time aisyah already complaining her feet ache, she got blister from wearing the new mock bata crock we bought her the day before.. huhu jenuh laa aku kena dukungggg
in the theatre she behave like a 2yr old should behave.. poking around, sekejap nk sit alone, then nk sit on me, jap nk susu, jap nk baring. once she got her feet stuck between the seat, adoilaaaaa cuak gak aku bila dah puas tarik but kaki dia takmo kuar hnshshh hnssshh nasib dia tak meraung dlm tu!
halfway thru the movie she ask for milk, nasib le ada saki baki lagi, dah la i dint bring water. elok teguk susu dia pun zzz... aleleee.. aku pulak sayang nk kuar..alang2 dah byr tiket tu layan je laa hehe
after that we went looking for her new shoes, but since kaki dah sakit all the shoes make her feet ache.last2 i had to buy her socks.nasib baik she's getting better, siap buleh lari2 lagi


we had lunch at chillis..purposely because she can cool down and the coloring tools will kept her busy.
by 3, im all tired, no mood to shop anymore hehe..sampai terlupa actually my aim was to checkout mothercare's sale.
we went to pick up hubby then head straight home. sampai rumah everybody was damn tired and zzz...except for aisyah.. and of course she wont let me sleeppp..must teman her with her business hehe
sabar je laaaa
hubby tak sedar habaq dah.. padahal dia bukan main pun hehe

tok mama bawa aisyah amik gambar kat mana tah.. giant kot
but we yet to reprint the pic. ni pun courtesy hubby yg recaoture the pic fr the framed one hihi

kenangan terindah 'yg tak berapa nk indah'

accidentally found my wedding picture (on hubby's side) in his fren's fotopages
haha kelakarnye muka masing2
he was soo kurus
me - huhu hate the crown..
mekap - kwn hb tulun
the most frustrating the cameraman (also his fren) forgot to set the light properly so all pictures end up so dark and so huduh huhu!

i stumbled upon my post about my miscarriage experience..
think i wat to keep it here..as reminiscence of what i have been thru..

mmg takleh terima sebab baby guling2 lagi masa scan tu. susu i pun dah ada cuma tak byk la rasa sakit kat breast and bila picit kuar sikit.
miscarried at 16 weeks. actually from 6th weeks i start spotting, so dr kasi hormon, baby looks healthy enough, bila scan je dok lompat2. i scan everymonth sbb kena close monitoring because of spotting and bleeding tu. lepas 12 weeks hepi sgt sebab org kata, even my dr pun ckp risiko nk gugur dah drop. pastu aku dgn tawakalnya balik kg. on the way back bleeding sikit, tak byk pun cam mula2 nk period je, terus di hosp, scan baby stil ok but kena tahan kat wad suruh rilek 2 hr, masa tu 15 weeks, kuar spital mlm tu cam biasa tak sakit apa cuma bila bgun pagi noticed ada fresh blood secoit kat spender, pastu gi kencing tak berani guna toilet bowl, aku kencing kat lantai je incase ada benda apa2 kuar kang, masa kencing tu kuar mcm ketul daging, not blood clot. aku dah nangis gila sebab selalunya kalau mcm tu dah takde le tu. aku kol bgtau mak aku dia pun sama2 nangis. aku simpan and bawa gi tunjuk kat dr. dr siap konpius lagi amenda (?!!!) nurse dah pasang iv, mil aku dah pesan awal2 kalau dr ckp kena buang redha je kalau simpan pun kalau tak sihat/tak elok nnt lagi susah, aku n hubby diam je.. dlm hati mcm taknak tp aku konpius. dlm hati dok doa biarlah selamat lagi anak aku.. petg tu baru scan tengok ya allah baby ok ja dok lompat2 sommersoult lagi kat dlm aku dah hepi2, mak aku on the way nk mai kl dah sume org hepi. dr ckp esok boleh balik.. yahuu
mlm tu aku suruh hubby temankan tp dia takut kena halau ngn pak gad, aku buat muka sedih pun tak jln gak. tp kejap2 dia kol borak2 ngn aku. around 10 pm aku rasa sakit, cuak dahh.. pastu noticed timing dia makin kerap. eventho aku takde pengalaman rasa contraction but dari pembacaan dan citer org aku rasa contraction le kot. kul 11 lebih aku tak tahan dah aku panggil nurse minta painkiller kalau boleh amik. tak lama lepas tu nurse dtg nk injek. dlm dok sakit tu siap boleh tanya nurse'are u sure boleh amik ni? " dia ckp dr kata boleh. dah injek pun tak hilang gak sakit tu, aku siap doa dlm hati kalau sakit sebab baby nk kuar aku redha cuma bglah aku tanda supaya aku dpt bertenang, kalau bukan sebab baby nk kuar aku rela sakit camna punn.. huhu.. masa tu mmg taktau la nk ckp apa, konpius, takut, sedih sume ada dahla berjuang sorang2. hubby on the way fr s.alam, rupanya mil aku pun dah tak sedap ati jek so dia ikut sama. dlm kul 12 gitu aku rasa ada benda kuar kat tut teruss panggil nurse. si nurse ni pulak budak lagi bila dia tgk terus mcm nk pengsan! aku lagi ler cuak tahap gaban tah apa la yg ada kat tut aku tu agaknya, dia pesan kat aku akak jgn buat apa2 tau!!, dr lak ada kes kat op theatre, nasib baik ada dr pelatih kebetulan dtg menyembang kat wad tu (aku dok wad kelas 1 spital selayang) kalau wad OnG dia maybe nurse dia well prepared to handle kes cam gini kot. nasible dr pelatih tu cam rilek je, and sejurus lepas tu dr OnG aku dtg, dia sloewly ckp kat aku baby dah kuar so nothing can be done to put him back inside. the whole proses tak sakit pun sebab baby kuar naturally akuteran sikit je dah kuar abis ngn uri sumer. aku minta tgk baby, diorang letak dlm plastik kontener tu.. 'nurse tu cam takut2 je nk kasi, takut aku takleh kontrol kott..kecik je anak aku..besar tapak tgn tp sebab ada darah lagi aku tak berani pegang. semua dah cukup sifat.. dlm hati aku ckp takpe la baby, takde jodoh kita, mummy redha ko pergi, nnt kita jumpa lagi. KEBETULAN MLM TU MLM JUMAAT, NISFU SYAABAN so aku redha semua tu dgn harapan tahun baru moga2 diampun dosa2 aku yg byk selama ni, bertambah rahmat dan rezeki yg lebih lagii
aku tunggu more than 6mth baru stat concieve balik, aku ni penakut sikit, ikut ckp org tua2 bagi rahim betul2 kuat and sihat dulu
my story tak abis lagi.. masa tgh cuci darah semua mlm tu hubby sampai with mil, hubby pandang i dgn muka sedih, dia duduk sebelah, pegang tgn i and terus tunduk, mcm nk nangiss.. but i try senyum ja kat dia and gosok kepala dia aicehh mcm drama la pulak we both tak ckp apa..until besoknya. hubby balik rumah urus baby, mil stay jaga mlm tu. sakitnya bila rahim nk kecut balikk..
pg tu mak i sampai and mil balik rumah. bila dr dtg for morning check, dia tekan2 aje perut dia ckp dah kuar semua takyah dnc.. boleh blk dah.aku ni ikut je la mana tau apa kan.. mak aku lak jenis percaya abis ngn dr. mil kol tanya dr scan tak? suruh scan dulu konpem clear semua baru discaj.. but too late aku dah discaj. balik rumah bleeding cam biasa tp still sakit skit2 cam senggugut kat bawah perut. after a week mil bawa aku gi scan kat private spital, tgk2 ada sikit lagi tertinggal.. so we decide to buat dnc, actually sikit sgt dr kata takwat pun takpe cuma risiko incase ada infection takut boleh jadi cancer ke apa ka nnt. masa nk dnc tu dr tu boleh tersilap injek ubat bius, terus bengkak satu tgn. dah le kena bius taksedar, sedar2 tgn takleh angkat. mmg cuak ingatkan sikit2 je, balik rumah tak surut lansung, esoknya pi balik kat dr tu dia suruh xray kot2 patah ke (#$%&^%&^) bile masa lak tgn aku patahh mmg aku sedar lagi time dia cucuk tu and siap kata éh silap' !!! mak aku mmg angin le. dr kasi ubat sapu je and to come again after 3 days kalau tak surut lagi. pastu aku gi urut ngn jiran aku, dia ckp mmg salah urat, lepas urut surut sikit jek and still takleh gerak.. imagine dahle kena pantang, tgn sebelah takleh gerak aku rasa cam cacat je..nak sikat rambut pakai baju sume susahh sgt. dah le emosi tak betul time tu.. jap2 nangis, pastu nak marah org je, mmg tekanan perasan betull. pernah aku nk mandi pastu terhegeh2 buka baju and pegang gayung aku nangiss dlm bilik airr. pastu aku tanya mak aku > ada tak aku buat salah ngn dia?? kot2 la tgn aku ni pernah buat apa2 ke tu pasal tuhan balas balik cam gini.. mak aku pun nangis sama.. ko tau la dlm pantang kan mana buleh nangis kang meroyan tak pasal2.
lepas tu aku balik kg cuti dekat 2 minggu, kuasa tuhan sepupu aku kenalkan dgn sorang pakcik ni, aku pun pi berubat dgn dia, dia ckp ubat bius tu dah masuk kat dlm urat, pastu agaknya bocor kot dah absorb sikit kat dlm isi, nmpk kat dlm tu mcm dah lebam, aku cuak gila buatnya gangrene takke naya?!! pastu aku noticed ibu jari and tgn aku stat shrinking, nails look weird..ohmigod!! tgn aku sememangnya kebas je manjang setat dari awal lagi, tpk tgn lak rasa pedih ja, mcm kena api. kalau time sejuk laagi seksa. amboii panjangnya citer aku hehe. alhamdulillah lepas 3 hari surut tu hilang and back to normal, except for kebas sikit2 and tpk tgn still sakit. aku syukur sgt sebab dah boleh gerak sikit2. balik kl aku gi jumpa dr kat klinik biasa dia suspek carpal tunnel, then referred to gh buat test karan tu sume. aku pun byk research kat internet, konfem aku kena gangguan sarf. but dr sebenarnya takde ubat utk sakit saraf camni.. ubat yg dia bagi tu pun sebenarnya vitamin b12 je to speedup the healing. my body will heal itself and rebuild but it will takes times. dr tu siap kira utk aku, based on jarak tempat sakit which is masa tu dah ok sikit cuma kebas from elbow and below, for about 1inch will take i month, so roughly it will take another 6 months to heal. true after 6 month no more kebas but tpk tgn stil sakit sometimes esp bila sejuk.
alhamdulillah now i would say 99.5 back to normal even sometimes fingers stil rasa cam kebas2 sikit bila sejuk. aku tak salahkan dr tu, she's a human too bukan dia sengaja, and maybe vein aku sensitif ke..as long as im ok now is enough. kalau nk saman ke apa ke kesian periuk nasi dia lak, she's such a nice dr actually.
after more than 10 mths aku preknen balik, mmg takut sebab probably rahim tak kuat, karang kena ikat ke susah lak,masa tu again bila mlm nisfu syaaban aku teringat kisah dulu.. dah tu bila scan aje baby dok diam je, tido memanjang!! but as her growth progress steadily, heartbeat ok, im happy. but then when 30 weeks she looks quite small but still under kontrol, aku pun apa lagii makan byk2 next checkup naik berat aku and baby but still small compared to sepatutnya. dr ckp mungkin dia mmg jenis kecik kot. lastly genap 37w aku pegi another dr as to standby sebab dekat dgn rumah mil, mil soh aku dok sana sampai deliver. the night before aku siap gi tesco lagi but dlm kul 2 gitu cam rasa senggugut but very mild tp bila timing mcm sejam sekali, cuak gak but since still early aku rilek je, malas nk kejutkan hubby and mil. bila hubby bangun nk gi keja baru aku ckp ngn mil, pastu dekat pukul 7 tu tak sakit dah. kul 9 gi spital, 10.30 jumpa dr and bgtau nak register kat sini, and bgtau dia pasai sakit semlm, bila dr check rupanya dah terbuka 3cm, terus masuk labor room, kul 11 masuk ubat 1.30 selamat. alhamdulillah senang je except aku mamai so takleh teran kena vakumm, kalau tidak takyah jahit pun sebab baby mmg kecik.
memula mmg tak nangis but bila balik rumah mula le teringat..dah tu hubby lak ckp masa basuh@mandikan baby utk tanam tu dah nmpk gender mcm boy.. he's so cute.. i noticed ada iras2 hubby sebijik.. lepas tu lama gak takleh tgk hubby sure nangiss... kitorang siap kebumikan cam biasa and letak nama muhammad, amik syarat. hubby ckp kat aku 'takpe la, next time biar dpt baby girl lak mcm u '' .. laaagi le kuat aku nangiss alhamdullillah now happy with nuraisyah farhana, 4 mths.

baby..
mummy will always remember you

coffee anyone?

this round of pregnancy sees me craving for coffee
i know caffein is not good for pregnant mom but i just cudnt help it.
it starts at first when i cant put any drink into my tekak, end up i tried the black coffee and it works! from then, there goes my coffee crazess
every outing will not be complete without a stop at coffee joint,
sampai my doter pun dah accustomed to coffee haha
there's one time, she pulled 2 chairs together and said ' ni aisyah nk minum kopii..'

last weekend we tried the infamous oldtown kopitiam.. selalu tgk ramai je org so why dun we sample it ourselve kan..
we had the chicken chor fun (kot)cudnt remember its real tajuk, toast, curry mee, hot mocha ipoh white coffe, ipoh white coffee hot nad err tak ingat la wat another drink that hubby had

the verdict :
the coffe was too strong for my liking
and it was not a wise decision to mix it up with choc huhu
but the chicken soup and curry mee was marveles
the toast was the biggest dissappoinment - check out the pic yourselve and u'l know why

see the thin railway of butter? hmm
maybe they'r promoting healthy lifestyle kot hehe

the soup is good, nevertheless.. the day's savior

conclusion: i wont go near this coffeshop again hehe, as long as pak li, uncle lim are around..


the not-so-satisfied me
uh uhhh i look fat!!!

while we r there, hubby tells me story on how the outlet come about
apparently the original ipoh white coffe shop was at the brink of closing down, but one of the loyal customer, a malay guy wanted to buy the shop. the owner asked him why he want the shop, the business is doing bad. the guy told the owner that now its becoming a hype in town for drinking coffee and kopitiam and all bla blaa..
so the owner didnt get to close his shop, instead he embark on that man's idea to expand his business. he start by making the instant coffee packets and sells them to supermarket (do u remember suddenly there's a flock of instant coffee in the market in last 7-8 years?)
after about a year, he manage to locate that poor guy (who was actually almost a branckrupt himself) and paid him compensation for his idea, a mere sum of like 50k or sumthing. that man is just satisfied with that, he said that that's what his rezeki were meant to be.. but he got the priviliged of dining for free at any outlet, no matter how many patron he bring with him.
i dunno how true this story is.. so dun quote me okay

this morning while stranded in traffic jam i seems to have a lot to write here
but when i finally able to get in here, everythinh vanished
so
have to crack something later on..

soping spreee

accidentally i happen to know ada makeup and skincare sale
apa lagasss..
check out the price bebeh
maunya aku tak meroyann

melancholy

how im i supposed to feel when i feel betrayed?
no no betrayed is not exactly the word
guess iam just being jealous
am i?
should i?
my confidence and trust has shattered to pieces
dunno how am i going to put everything into pieces again
deep down i know eventho i manage to, it will not be the same anymore
why must i feel this way?
of course laaa!!! how you think i feel??
#%$&^^***()^^$%^@#$!
come and try sit in my shoes and i 'l show u why!

when i see you
i dunno what i see anymore

birthday girl

okay.. the day is finally here
but well.. not much to selebret
- the fact that aisyah is not here with us make me feel less than a birthday mum
last nite pau hubby kat the coast.. ala bukan selalu nk merasa treat dia kan
and we had the big talk last nite
kind of revelation to me
what a good start to the 'new' me.. hmmm

my ofismate throw me a small party
what a thought..anyway its not solely for me hihi. its a custom here to celebret birthdays in the month, so only 2 of us this month

anak sapaaaa la ni...

it is my fren's little love
she and his boy were on the way to bandung to meet her man
guess he is boring tak sampai2 lagi hehe
sian..sampai tertido
miss daddy so much eh?

Stop and stare

This town is colder now, I think it's sick of us
It's time to make our move, I'm shakin off the rust
I've got my heart set on anywhere but here
I'm staring down myself, counting up the years
Steady hands, just take the wheel...
And every glance is killing me
Time to make one last appeal... for the life I lead

Stop and stare
I think I'm moving but I go nowhere
Yeah I know that everyone gets scared
But I've become what I can't be, oh
Stop and stare
You start to wonder why you're 'here' not there
And you'd give anything to get what's fair
But fair ain't what you really need
Oh, can u see what I see

They're tryin to come back, all my senses push
Un-tie the weight bags, I never thought I could...
Steady feet, don't fail me now
Gonna run till you can't walk
But something pulls my focus out
And I'm standing down...

Stop and stare
I think I'm moving but I go nowhere
Yeah I know that everyone gets scared
But I've become what I can't be, oh
Stop and stare
You start to wonder why you're here not there
And you'd give anything to get what's fair
But fair ain't what you really need
Oh, you don't need

What u need, what u need...

Stop and stare
I think I'm moving but I go nowhere
Yeah I know that everyone gets scared
But I've become what I can't be
Oh, do u see what I see...

dunno wat to write laa
lately this place dah jadi cam scrap book pulakk

ok
last week ada otomen tersesat kat sg wang
getik je aku nk bawa aisyah pi tgk
but hubby didnt dare to bring himself
takut he cannot control himself and borong all the merchandise there hehe
ingatkan budak2 je, rupanya bapak budak pun still tak hilang keobsesan pada otomen ni

hubby entertaining himself at the fish spa
hihi kukikukikk dia gelak sorang2
gelii wehhh!!

i said careful karang abis timbul ikan2 tu
wakakaka!