its not that easy

yesterday i read in a friend's blog about how she somehow dreaded her life, juggling between being a wife and mother to twin boys.. and i couldnt agree more! she's currently based overseas as her husband is working there. she said of course there are happy times, but sometimes she just broke down and cry, she spent most of times in fornt of pc chatting with people she never met, buying things online.. do things that her husband will never understand why.. actually many of us working mother envy her and would happily trade places with her.. well, the grass is alwaaays look greener on the other side, isnt it?

somehow she reminds me of myself..eventho i'm working mum, but my social life is kind of limited to my family. my friends slowly disappeared..yeah they too now have they own lives aren't they? in office pun there's not many officer to befriend, except this one girl who i considered as kakak since she's older and much wiser, selalu bagi i advice. with my staff i cannot mingle much, just baik gitu2 je. derang ni takleh baik sgt , i mean kena la ada gap sikit between staff-boss, rite?

sometimes..i would stand at the window and just stare at the world outside..feeling somekind of loneliness.. i dont know why. sometimes i just feel like crying for no reason.. sometimes i feel so trapped. dont know why.. sedangkan i have a wonderful family now, a wonderful husband who love me dearly and always give me great advice(that none others would tell me!) and now we're blessed with wonderful little princess whose smile makes me forget everything else. being with them completes me, like the world doesnt exist anymore..because they're my world!